Security 'Invention': Bullet-Resistant Furniture

By: John Honovich, Published on Aug 14, 2015

Do you lose sleep at night worrying your love seat will be murdered?

Do you fear that your sofa will be a victim of a drive by shooting?

Then, a new SIA member has the solution to your problems.

** *** **** ***** at ***** ******** **** love **** **** ** murdered?

** *** **** **** your **** **** ** a ****** ** * drive ** ********?

****, * *** *** member *** *** ******** to **** ********.

[***************]

*****,*** ** ************ ********* ********* ******* *** ***** "** ** *** ********* where ******** ***** ******** design."

**** ** ***** ********* *****

*********, **** **** ** is ***** ****** ****** furniture, **** *** **** being **** *** *** the ********* ** * shield. ***** ******** *** cited ** *** ****** market, ** ******** **** **********:

***** *** *********** **** ************ for **** ********, ** very **** ******** / risk ************. ** *** other ****, **** ** are *** *********** ****** La-Z-Boys ****** *********, ******* underscores *******'* *********** ************* with ****.

*** ***** **********, *** may ******** ************* **** new ****** ********* **** the#* ******* ** *** West **** **** - a *********** *********.

Comments (15)

Avatar

Luis Carmona

IPVMU Certified | 08/14/15 12:14pm

Thnaks, John! This is good to know for anyone moving to South Chicago or Guatemala.

Undisclosed #1

08/14/15 12:57pm

In other news, ammunition makers are working on a special furniture-piercing round.

Avatar

Luis Carmona

IPVMU Certified | 08/14/15 01:06pm

In all seriousness, there are some really paranoid customers out there... few that are this extreme, but they are there. And you never know, sometimes they may be legitimately paranoid. (Witness protection, extortion victime, estranged spouse, etc.)

And even if you never ever sell one in your career, it could be an interesting eye catcher that could make your company stand out in the website or marketing material. "We install video surveillance, ACS, alarms... and we're an authorized dealer of "bullet resistant furniture"." How many integrators list biometrics on their line cards, even though it may be an extremely small percentage of business, but it looks cool.

John Honovich

IPVM | In reply to Luis Carmona | 08/14/15 01:11pm

"We are Oklahoma's exclusive dealer of ToughDog cameras and Ballistic Furniture Systems."

I like how you are thinking...

Avatar

Brian Rhodes

IPVMU Certified | In reply to John Honovich | 08/14/15 01:46pm

I bet that would be a killer roadshow.

Also, allow me to clarify the vague 'bullet resistence' exception the CEO cited in his comments.

1) It's not bullet proof if it absorbs the force of the bullet, which the Kevlar does. The Kevlar is rated to absorb & dissipate up to a certain amount of force (think multiple bullets in a small area), but once that point is exceeded, it fails.

2) Rifle bullets have more energy than handgun bullets. Notice the demo used a 9mm hangun. Those bullets typically have less than 1/4th the ballistic energy than a .223 rifle, despite being a larger bullet. (Why? Higher velocity, or f=m*a)

Summary: A bad guy wielding a rifle probably would not be slowed down by this furniture.

Undisclosed Integrator #2

08/14/15 01:08pm
If only there was more effort put into the "right to arm bears" rather than the "right to bear arms" there would never be any need for a gun shielding chair. Only in America.....

Jack Sink

IPVMU Certified | 08/14/15 04:37pm

True as Luis said there are some really paranoid customers out there....usually the same ones that can't pay their bills and buy their video system at Sam's. I would gladly refer them to a competitor I really didn't like -"Call Joe at Conspiracy Security, they sell bullet resistant furniture, dehydrated survival foods and top notch complete camera systems for under $100!"

John Honovich

IPVM | 08/17/15 07:57pm

They are trying to cross-promote / jump on the new NWA movie:

Undisclosed #3

08/17/15 08:24pm

Between Petzi and Ballastic I'm not sure whose market research is worse.

Now make some dog resistant furniture, or a camera that fires live rounds and then you'll have my attention!

Joe Summanen

08/28/15 01:39pm

What I'm really waiting for is this...just need the spidey sense to go with it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ftEAdOKy6CY

Avatar

Scott Gerrels

IPVMU Certified | 09/04/15 06:45am

Now if they could just market something like this in Japan that could handle Godzilla.

John Honovich

IPVM | 09/28/15 05:07pm

Their tagline now: "Protecting people from unexpected gun violence."

John Honovich

IPVM | 12/23/15 07:19pm

Update: the company continues with fear mongering at the movies.

Undisclosed #3

In reply to John Honovich | 12/24/15 05:05am

Crazy. Right up there with libraries, movies are one of the safest forms of sitting known, as opposed to the way you might get there for instance, driving.

You may be more likely to get eaten by an alligator than shot in a theatre. ;)

John Honovich

IPVM | 04/15/16 11:12am

SIA continues to promote these guys.

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